Video Q&A: “How can I find love when I’m scared my body will be rejected?”
Reading / watching time: 19 mins
I recently received this heart-opening question from a sensitive woman in recovery from binge eating - and I know she’s not alone.
She asked…
“I want to find love but have been holding myself back because of fear of rejection as my body is larger than I’d like it to be. The way you talk about being a highly sensitive person really resonates and can see how I use food for comfort and also as a buffer to protect me from other people and situations. I’ve also tried so many times to lose weight but I know now it just makes my binge eating worse, and I’m now heavier than ever.
I’ve got to the point where I don’t want to wait any longer for love, but I’m scared that I’ll like a guy but he’ll be put off by my body or I’ll have to tell a potential boyfriend about my binge eating and again, that will put him off. Any advice?”
So in this video, I explore what it means to open yourself up to love when your relationship with your body feels complicated. Whether you’ve struggled with binge eating, body image, or the fear that you have to “fix yourself” before being loved, I hope this supports you deeply.
Quotes from the video
“Most women find themselves binge eating due to dieting. And this is a really hard thing to acknowledge because most of us, we kind of know it, we’re aware that’s the case on one level but we don’t want to fully acknowledge it because we hope that the next diet is going to be the thing that helps us to lose weight and stop bingeing.”
“You don’t have to be fearless to find love, not at all. You just have to be willing to take those steps, with the fear whilst reminding yourself that “I am worthy enough to be seen and to be heard” - this is the real work.”
“The truth is, the right relationship for you won’t require you to force your body to change. What it will require you to do is to show up fully, as yourself, with your heart open.”
“What is also true is that there are many, many - there are millions of people who are in loving, supporting relationships, regardless of the size of their body. And this also includes people, like you, who have challenges and struggles with their relationships with food and their body.”
“Remember that your sensitivity is not a flaw - and I can’t say this enough - your sensitivity and your empathy are going to be gifts that someone really, really values.”
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